Over the last four years, I have battled something that a lot of us do. In-laws, aka out-laws. I am sure these issues come in all shapes, sizes, and degrees of meddling. A friend of mine was recently told by her mother-in-law, "You should get a higher paying job so you can afford to formula feed." This is from the same mother in law who has eaten out of her trash. I have personally found that is not uncommon.
I have experienced meddling in our finances, religious practices, nanny, and tax procedures (to name a few). I have also experienced being sent lingerie by my mother-in-law, along with being criticized for how much we spent on our new home. Additionally, I have been informed on how interest free financing works. I wish I were joking. Yes, I have spent the last 13 years in finance but why should that matter? We couldn't possibly know anything about anything. Most recently, my experience has been with the childlike behaviors of these relatives; a temper tantrum over basic communication that resulted in me shouting "Everybody out of my office."
My last experience involved a closed door being opened. A door in my home. When I demanded she leave and close the door behind her, what happened next? She went to my bedroom and opened that closed door. When she saw her son wasn't there, she went to our master bath and opened that closed door to where my husband was showering This was all to get direction on an uber request over five hours before flight time. Then, to top it off, one of our toilets was left clogged. Her solution was to put an "out of order" sign on it. The next day, I noticed and had to run to get Drano. I then had to plunge the toilet, that was also covered in dried shit, with a baby on my hip. I mean, there was obviously no time to run out and get some Drano when there was only a mere 5.5 hours to make it to the airport. Did I mention my husband had been discharged from the hospital the prior day after an emergency appendectomy?
Don't parents want to have adult relationships with their grown children or do they strive to handicap them? It is one thing to love, care, and be concerned, but it is another to show a complete disregard for all boundaries. I have asked on many occasions for boundaries to be acknowledged but that continues to be a lot to ask for. Isn't one of a parent's main jobs to teach their children to be self-sufficient? Until then, I guess I will be forced to deal with the shit. Pun intended.